


Summon You

by mileskaane



Category: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
Genre: Games, M/M, Masturbation, Sex Games, Unresolved Sexual Tension, stealthy wanking, urban dictionary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:01:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25738468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mileskaane/pseuds/mileskaane
Summary: Stealthy Wanking:A game where, one person to begins to have a wank, and on the brink of cumming, the person then calls his mum. This person must then finish himself off before his mum enters his room.
Relationships: Guillermo de la Cruz/Nandor the Relentless
Comments: 6
Kudos: 34





	Summon You

**Author's Note:**

> I first saw that urban dictionary entry years ago and it's plagued my mind ever since. Somehow that thought turned itself into a fic about these two.
> 
> twitter: tofumuse  
> tumblr: mangostv

It was a typical evening, the vampires all waiting around aimlessly for Guillermo whilst he was out doing whatever errands they’d demanded from him the previous night. Why he couldn’t have completed them all whilst they slept was beyond them. How much sleep did humans really need? Nandor never really knew what to do with himself in his familiars absence and had settled on sitting with Nadja and Laszlo when the latter had declared he had something exciting to share with him.

“Right, so I’ve been looking at this amazing website on this Internet thing called Urban Dictionary.”

“You’ve been reading the dictionary?” Nadja asked in confusion.

“No! It’s a website that defines the youthful and trendy slang of today!”

“Why do you need to know slang? Who are you going to be chatting to other than us?”

As they argued, Nandor rolled his eyes, begging in his mind for Guillermo to return and free him for whatever he’d gotten himself trapped in.

“ _Anyway_ ,” Laszlo emphasised the word. “I wanted to explain a game I discovered whilst I was perusing the interweb. Specifically to Nandor.”

“Oh?” Nandor was interested now. It was directed at him, after all.

“Basically, you start having a wank.”

Nadja rolled her eyes and walked out of the room. Laszlo didn’t even seem to notice.

“You start having a wank and when you feel yourself reaching completion, you call the name of whoever is in the house with you. The old boys on Urban Dictionary called their mothers but we do not have that luxury.” he looked into the distance.

“What is even the aim of this game?” Nandor asked in confusion.

“Well, old chap.” Laszlo smirked. “You have to try and cum before whoever you call walks in.”

Nandor raised his eyebrows. That was certainly interesting. He was always up for a challenge.

“I tried it with Nadja earlier but she walked in before I was done, then had the bloody cheek not to help me out.”

“Uh huh.” Nandor responded, not really wanting to learn the intricacies. He was saved at this moment by Colin Robinson emerging from the shadows.

“Fucking hell, how long have you been there?” Laszlo exclaimed.

“A while.” Colin shrugged. “I’m not sure I like the idea of your game.”

“You come up with something better.”

“Well, I know a game called 52 card pickup.” Colin said, a devious smile on his face and somehow producing a pack of cards from seemingly nowhere.

“How do you-“ Nandor started.

“DO NOT ask him how to play!” Laszlo yelled.

xxxx

It was the next evening and Nandor decided it would be simply hilarious to try out that little game Laszlo had mentioned on Guillermo. He knew his familiar was loyal and would come running, which made the challenge all the more thrilling. Plus, he could get Guillermo to clean him up afterwards. It was nothing but a win-win situation. There were absolutely no downsides to this.

He informed Laszlo of his plan when he and Nadja were grabbing their overcoats to go for a nighttime walk in the local park. 

“Oh, you have to tell me how it goes. The bloody face Gizmo will have if he runs in before you’re done!” he laughed, Nandor joining in. Nadja pulled a face. “I’ll speak to you later.” Laszlo said with a wink.

Nandor almost ran to his room in excitement, hoping not to run into his familiar on the way there. Initially, he was planning on touching himself in his open coffin but decided upon reaching his room that his grand decorative armchair would be much more fitting.

His cock was already half-hard in his restrictive trousers. He shimmied off some of his more decorative layers before lounging back on the chair and undoing the string on his already quite revealing blouse, baring his chest. It was impossible for him to pleasure himself if he wasn’t fully immersed in the situation, the dramatic bitch in him always having to make an appearance. A nipple peeked out of his blouse.

He raised himself slightly to free himself from his trousers, only pulling them past his hips and to the middle of his thigh and revealing his large cock. Nandor was proud of what usually hid in his trousers. He had length, and the girth to go with it. It was impressive, and he knew it. Throwing his head back, he began stroking himself to full hardness.

It didn’t take long, having been a while since he’d allowed himself to partake in this personal pleasure. He slowed down his movements then, not wanting to bring himself to orgasm too quickly. This was a treat he rarely allowed himself the pleasure of enjoying. He wasn’t too sure why. His age? He’d experienced so much pleasure in his centuries of being alive, it was as if he was denying himself masturbation as a way to make each time more significant. Sexual encounters were a whole other story, one he wanted to push aside but had to bring to the forefront of his mind in order to help himself along.

Sex had always been plentiful in Nandor’s life, alive and dead. He’d had 37 wives, after all. But it had become different since coming to Staten Island. It’d been less frequent for starters. Sure, he had some casual encounters with Laszlo but they didn’t really mean anything. Sometimes another person touching him felt nice but it never seemed enough. There was always someone else nagging in the back of his mind whenever any of these recent encounters happened.

Nandor wasn’t sure when he’d fallen in love with Guillermo. It seemed to come out of nowhere and denying its existence was easier than thinking about it. Is it why he teased him so relentlessly, why he was wanking right now with the intention of his familiar seeing him?

Guillermo seeing him like _this_ , the thought alone was enough to cause an involuntary shudder of arousal. He squeezed his cock to hold back his orgasm, he wanted to actually play this game.

“G-Guillermo” he stammered, definitely not loud enough. Nandor swallowed and tried again. “Guillermo! Come here please!”

It had come out somewhat normal, only a bit of a wobble to his voice. His hand was unable to go any slower now. As he heard the approach of his familiar on the creaky landing, Nandor whined as a rush of adrenaline coursed its way through his body. Precum dribbled over his knuckles and his legs involuntarily spread further as he felt his orgasm heat up deep within him.

“You called, Master?” Guillermo said, peering around the door.

“Guillermo!” Nandor cried out, his orgasm hitting him the second his familiars face appeared at the door. Ropes of cum began to shoot from his cock and Nandor’s head fell back with a full body shudder.

“Oh, shit.” Guillermo said quietly, terrified he’d walked in on such a personal moment but unable to look away.

Nandor’s orgasm subsided and his hand dropped from his cock in exhaustion. He huffed and half opened his eyes.

“Well?” He said.

Guillermo’s face was burning red and he seemed to be frozen to the wooden floorboards. Were his glasses fogging up?

“Master?” Was all he could say, unsure of what Nandor was asking of him here. 

“I got you good, didn’t I?” Nandor grinned, baring his fangs. “Pranked!”

Guillermo was at a loss for words, mostly because he was unsure as to how this constituted a prank. All he’d done was witness his master's orgasm and had a good view of his healthy erection, an erection which was now beginning to flag and sitting intimidatingly between Nandor’s thick hairy thighs.

“Clean up this mess, Guillermo.”

Guillermo swallowed and nodded, leaving the room. He returned a few moments later with a rag and a bowl of water, walking over to where Nandor was still sat and getting on the floor.

“What are you doing? You’re supposed to care for your master first!” Nandor exclaimed, watching as Guillermo went to start wiping cum off the floor.

“What do you mean, Master?” Guillermo asked, face burning again as he looked up at Nandor from the floor.

“You should be cleaning me first.” Nandor said, his voice quieter as he assessed their current positions. He was still very much naked from the waist down, his cock level with Guillermo’s face.

“Right. Sorry, Master.” Guillermo went to touch Nandor with the rag in his hand before his Master flinched away.

“I won’t be washed with a filthy rag, Guillermo! Fetch a washcloth!”

Guillermo let out a heavy sigh before hauling himself back off the floor and out of the room. He returned again with a fresh washcloth and he approached Nandor quickly, chewing at his bottom lip. Dunking the flannel in the bowl of water from before, Guillermo let out a small breath before finally touching his master with the cloth. 

He tried not to acknowledge in his mind that the sticky material he was wiping off Nandor’s hands and thighs was precum. Tried even harder to ignore the fact he was wiping a big glob of cum from Nandor’s tummy.

“Don’t ignore my dick.” Nandor hummed. He had his eyes closed as he lounged in the chair. Guillermo could have punched him. 

Guillermo clenched his teeth when Nandor let out a small moan as he cleaned off his cock with the warm washcloth. Trying to clean it in one fluid motion before giving the dark pubic hair nestled at the base a swift scrub.

“Done, Master.” Guillermo said, stepping back. His mouth felt like he’d been eating sand.

“Thank you, Guillermo.” Nandor opened his eyes and gave his familiar a warm smile, making Guillermo’s heart skip a beat. “Now, carry on cleaning the floor for me like a good familiar.”

Guillermo closed his eyes and inhaled.

“Okay, Master.”


End file.
